Gosh, I’ve just been showered with blessings these past couple days! SO much has changed. For better, for worse…I’m loving it all! God has started moving my life in this new direction that has truly been AMAZING! School is going along smoothly and work is…well work is work! ha. For some reason its been so dead. Idk if people are just starting to eat healthy or dont have the money to go out, but its not looking too good for my bank account. Ha sad day. On the flip side though there is this boy. :) Unlike any other boy that I’ve come across. Crazy right? I thought they were all the same. He’s been sweet,caring, thoughtful, observant…im sure I could keep going. But i’ll save you the time, who wants to hear all that mushy nonsense. Ha not me…thats for sure. But somehow i’ve gotten over that wall. A lot of walls actually. It’s crazy how i’ve only known him for like 2 weeks and it feels like years. I’ve been so happy!! I can’t quite seem to wrap my head around what it is that gets me. His personality, his looks, his charm? But when I’m not with him I get so excited to be with him, then the second I’m with him I’m nervous. Is this how all this works?! That turning in your stomach that wont go away. Haha. Its definitely different, but a good different! Im used to having this empty feeling, like playing a role that leads to a dead end. And now that road is like boundless compassion. I can feel God walking beside me through this, it all seems to feel so right. But at the same time my flesh wants to be scared. Scared of getting hurt. Scared of feeling alone. Scared of allowing someone else to know me. It starts to make me push away, creating distance. I’ve noticed small things that are slowly starting to change though, which has been awesome! It feels so good to not care and just let go. But I dont want to lose control. I like being independent. Not having to respond to anyone. Its more of a pride thing. I can straight up tell you that my pride is definitely up there! It has a mind of its own and does what it wants. Kinda scary. I know I need to lay that down, but its so hard. To humble yourself before Christ and give it all to Him. Thats what we do with prayer isn’t it? Why is it so complicated for me to do it with my life.
So…lots of exciting things are happening in mah life!
Lemme just catch ya up a little!
Last saturday was our first day back from the beach…sad day.
BUT it was also the same day Wok Hay hired me on as a server!
So since saturday I have been training my butt offff anticipating the grand opening of this new store on wednesday! Ahh, I’m nervous and excited all at the same time. As long as I’m fun…energetic…and friendly…I should be fine right? It’s been grueling though. 12 hour straight training shifts can kinda make you wanna pull your hair out! Especially when they’re doing nothing but talking! Compared to some of the other new servers there I feel like I got this in the bag. But idk. This being my first time ever serving kinda drives me to a corner where in my head everyones picking on me and calling me names. ha. Guess thats just all in my head though! So if you are reading this and live anywhere in the vicinity of turkey creek, please come out and see me! Help lighten the mood! The food is freakin DANK. Ahh, so good! I can say I have successfully tried everything on the menu in the past 48 hours…yah thats right, I gained about 10 pounds in 2 days. Oh well, I’m sure it’ll go straight to my butt anyways. But back to what I was saying…great food, LIVE band, and ME! Other than my new job I feel like God is truly working in my life right now! He is leading me, guiding me, and walking with me! Its so cool to watch the little things He’s doing as he molds into who I am.
Time is a matter of life. Between eating, working, and sleeping 3 days have gone by. Wow. Crazy how time catches up with you like that! This year has been a whirlwind of adventures with time being a minor essence in it all! Senior year was the highlight of my life and i would relive it any day. Friends. Laughter. Boys. Teachers. Football games. Painting up. Late nights. Sleepovers. Hang outs. Sonic. Finals. Graduation. Then summer came…and in a blink of an eye everyone was sitting in rows next to new people listening to a foreign voice talk about the rules and expectations of their classroom. Let me just tell you that before summer even started my transmission went out…STORY OF MY LIFE! haha. So i went from may to august with no way of transportation what so ever! Thankfully I have friends who love me and have my back. With the help of my friends i somehow made my way around to any social event going on, or any party in the making. It was fabulous! Surrounding myself with best friends that could make me laugh by just making a funny face was the life. Inside jokes. The Lake. Happiness. Wake boarding. The Dock. Red Bull. Laying out. Being tan. boys AGAIN. haha. Rocket Summer. Dashboard Confessional. Windows down. Windblown messy hair. Popsicles. Sunshine. Slushies. Jammin with the music turned all the way up! Walking everywhere barefoot. And going in places with little clothes and just a bathing suit. Don’t you just wish papers and due dates didn’t exist! That life :: PAUSED :: for just a second! Look at some of your summer pictures…think about everything that was happening in that moment! And the one shot that you’re looking at is just a glimpse…a pause if you will…at that time in your life! Time, seems to be the key note here. Be happy! Enjoy time while it’s still in your hands. For you to control any was possible. Make the best of every moment! EVERY MOMENT! As the new year comes take a look back and turn it all around! Change your life in a way that will change you!
Kiss slowly, Laugh loudly, Love deeply, Forgive quickly, and Thank God EVERYDAY for your many blessings.